Indian Aspirations: Progress Update

Yesterday I went to Yamunanagar. Left at 5.30am arrived at 10.30am. We left Yamunanagar at 4.30 and only got back at 10pm. That's 10 1/2 hours in the car in one day! Part of the reason it took so much longer to get back was because of all the marriages (you say marriages not weddings before you correct me). There were 36 000 weddings in Delhi alone last night as it was the most auspicious day of the year to get married. I lost count of the number of scarlet and gold crested bands we saw marching along the road blasting their trumpets and heralding the arrival of their groom.

I unfortunately wasn't invited to any of these weddings which brings me to the progress I have made with my Indian Aspirations (see side bar) I set myself a couple of weeks after my arrival.

1. Ride side saddle on the back of a motorbike in a sari without a helmet
   Status: In progress. I have just got the sari, I have the motorbike and driver and 2 artistic photographers. The one flaw in my cunning plan is that I have no idea how to drape a sari. There is however, a particularly sweet old hindi lady downstairs. She doesn't speak a word of English but I am hoping that if I go there proferring her 6 metres of cloth she will get the picture.
2. Go to an Indian wedding
   Status: Negative ghostrider. Despite my best efforts I didn't crack the nod to an Indian wedding. I have however seen glimpses of what goes on behind the brightly draped pink and purple tents.
3. Get henna done on my hands
   Status: check. The only thing is that the lady that did it didn't speak English very well and when she told me to wash it off after half an hour what she actually meant to say was don't get it wet for 12 hours and rub mustard seed oil in it to make sure it goes nice and dark. As a result my henna was an unimpressive light orange.
4. Learn basic Hindi
   Status: check. That is if very basic Hindi counts. A few weekly lessons is just not enough to pick up this beautiful but completely foreign language.
5. Meet the Dalai Llama
   Status: Negative. I did go to his home town though and was there for the marching and general outrage over the Chinese president's visit to India.
6. Have a kick ass birthday party
   Status: In progress. Watch this space.

Mythbusters

When I came to India everyone assured me that it was the perfect opportunity to save money because everything is so cheap. Let me clarify this for those of you that are planning on coming over for a spot of travelling. Textiles such as bags and clothes are quite cheap. Silver jewellery although not cheap is far more affordable than it would be in SA. Accomodation in small towns is quite cheap. Eating in small towns is quite cheap. Drinking in small towns is quite cheap. Delhi is very expensive.

To be more specific, going out in Delhi is incredibly expensive. Part of the problem is that a large portion of the going out places are in hotels and thus carry hotel prices: a large bottle of beer (750ml) (the Big Mac index for people between the age of 18 and 30) will set you back between 40 and 60 South Africans; a vodka, lime and soda costs about R50, a glass of wine (Indian) will cost you in the region of 60 to 70 bucks and for the budget breaking Mojito you're looking at about R90. More expensive than the Westcliff if my memory serves me correctly. Chanda reckons that it's more expensive than drinking in Washington DC! And that's without the non inclusive 20%VAT on drinks and the almost inevitably compulsory service charge.

The City of Smells

For all India's exotic spices, the pervasive smell of Delhi is of urine. This is especially true at the train stations where the scent of urine persistently pushes its way through the cracks in the windows of the train and invades the nostrils. But it gets worse. Every drain and river in Delhi vociferously exudes the same sickly sweet odour, a combination of excrement, urine, vomit, damp and rotting food. You learn to anticipate it's assault on your senses every time you drive over a bridge or a culvert.

In the beginning it puzzled me. I have travelled quite a bit around sub-saharan Africa and I don't remember ever being constantly assailed by these offensive smells. After 3 months of observation I have come to the following three conculsions:

1. People just piss everywhere. I've lost count of the amount of people I have seen just stop the scooters and relieve themselves on the side of the road. It's got so bad that the government has set up a committee to address the issue in time for the 2010 Commonwealth games in India.
2. The sewage system is inadequate and many roads do not even have drains (apparently the monsoon season is complete carnage). As a result, waste and water oftens stagnates in culverts and canals and does not get washed away.
3. For many residents in Delhi there are little to no facilities. In many of the slums there will be one running tap and no ablution facilities. As a result slum dwellers are forced to use the railway areas (to which the slums are almost inevitably adjacent) as their toilets. Coming into Delhi on an overnight train the surrounding area is almost crowded with people doing their morning ablutions.

Scary but true.